With everyone glued to their screens waiting in
anticipation for the update on my date which is or rather was supposed to be
taking place today, I’m sorry to say I did not go through with it. My apologies
to all the hopeless romantics who were hoping I would publish something that
would confirm that they are not crazy and that true love does exist. To the
realists, I have confirmed that not every cloud has a silver lining, I’m happy
to have made your day.
So what is a date? I know a date as a social engagement made with
one person beforehand. It means someone arranges to have fun with you in a social
setting and it usually ends with someone (the man) paying at the end of the
night. And no get your heads out of the gutter, payment is made to the cashier
at the movies or waiter at the restaurant and not you. Or maybe things have
changed but since when was a first date ever going to a guy’s place of residence.
Not even if you were Top Chef ma’f*cker !
I thought to myself; give this black man a chance,
maybe just maybe he could be the exception and not the rule. I believe there is
a rule amongst black men and that is not to ever surprise a woman. After today I can safely say to the ladies
who watch romantic flicks and hope they will meet someone like the ones they
see on screen, it is never going to happen. Black men do not have the element
of surprise that was confirmed for the 100th time today. White
chicks lose their marbles when they get engaged because it was a? YES you
guessed right, it was a SURPRISE!!! We know in advance his intention of bringing
his toothless uncles to your parents’ house to negotiate your price, once that
is done you go and choose your own damn ring. Where is the spontaneity? In Hollywood I tell
you, where we have no business in as far as I’m concerned. Today confirmed
that.
Shoot me and yourself for thinking that a date means
someone actually takes you out. Or that it means a man showing his charitable
heart and willingness to pay for just your company. Thank God for cell phones
though, imagine if he had telegrammed me where we were meeting and I actually showed
up all excited? I felt like Rapunzel who
flung out her long locks out the tower hoping the ‘prince’ will climb up with red
roses, wine and some Ocean Basket. Only in this fairy tale the prince shows up
holding a bunny chow and groovie. I asked myself what Rapunzel would do… Pull her locks back into the tower with
lightning speed of course! well that’s exactly what I did.
A date is not and will never be inviting a girl over
to your place, well not on the first one at least. That defeats the purpose of
getting to know each other trust me. If a girl does not really feel you all that
much taking her out on a date is better because you are guaranteed she will
stick around, not for the company *yawns* but for the idea of getting spoiled and
of course the all-important doggy bag. Taking her to your place is buzz kill. I
can guarantee you she will not stick around long enough for you to tell her
about yourself, something WILL come up. My friends were like, go maybe he
prepared a special something for you at his place? We all looked at each other
and laughed at that ridiculous suggestion. I mean we are experts and experience has taught
us that stuff is for white girls.
Thank Jesus I called before I even attempted to take a
bath and waste what's left of my sample perfume. The idea was not to go get acquainted with
some guys couch or let’s face it bed, I have my own and the relationship I have
with mine is pretty darn good, no introduction is needed. I had actually begun
to adjust my tone of voice, the bites I would be taking and yes I had sharpened
my teeth for a meal. Let this be a lesson to men to stop using the word DATE
unless you know what it means. And for those who use it fraudulently, to
embezzle some booty, God is watching you.
Kind Regards
Ms_Curvy
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